Last Saturday night was my company's holiday soiree, and I kind of didn't decide to attend until Friday night. Which meant...craziness on Saturday. This is how that decision played out:
Hair
My hair salon is in the basement of my apartment building. How convenient is that?! Anyway, I washed and dried my own hair, so that all she would have to do is curl it. Hairdressers never listen, though. Went for a routine curl, came out with an unauthorized cut. Goodbye dreams of one side short/one side long. That's over. However, I didn't really care, so, I paid...let eyebrow girl do my eyebrows, grabbed some pound cake (that's how the black hair salon rolls!) and was outta there!
Dress
Voice in fitting room: "I CAN'T BREATHE!!"
Other voice in same fitting room: "You get used to it. With these on you can eat and drink whatever you want. ALL NIGHT. All these years, I thought women just looked better than us in dresses, but they've been cheating all along.
Original voice: If you can't beat 'em...join 'em.
I knew IMMEDIATELY they were having the spanx discussion. I was in my fitting room cracking up. Gotta love the mall. However, that happened when things were still funny. When I was in the early dress-search stages. After hitting up Bloomingdales, Lord and Taylor, Nordstroms, BCBG, Francesca's, Macy's, Anthropologie, and then Macy's again...I found a dress! And by then...I was pissed. I could've cut someone. Perhaps I could have pepper-sprayed someone like that woman in Wal-Mart on Black Friday, except I'd be doing it to let off steam, rather than to snag a deal.
Food
A day of mayhem precludes you from eating a good meal. Starvation was my destiny. My one bit of nourishment was the pound cake at the salon. If I had eaten after shopping (after 4pm), I wouldn't be hungry at the party. So, I to the grocery store pick up razors, shaving cream, and...cup of noodles. Hits the spot, but doesn't fill me up. I think it was a genius move. Genius.
Nails
It's not summertime anymore, so my toenails were in major disarray. And, I wasn't paying $40 to get them fixed up. So it was my time to shine. But I really don't have a steady hand and I'm a clutz. As I was creating an abstract painting on my nails, I accidentally knocked the nail polish into the tub, where the red polish began to immediately spread out in a magical, beautiful shade of "goodbye rental deposit." So then I spend the next 20 minutes using a mixture of acetone, Comet, and Fantastik to get my tub clean...it didn't work. And truth: my nails looked really bad, but it was dark at that party, so my hack job was sufficient.
Feet
Your feet hurt after dancing and walking around in heels. The company ACTUALLY provided us with socks and flip flops to help with dance floor woes. I decided to take both to create what I call "holiday feet." These holiday feet were seen at Circa last night, as well as on trains of DC during the "Day After."
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Day After
So after dancing the night away, and thinking we were still young enough to have an "after party" longer than 30 minutes, we crashed post 2:30am in DC. I wake up at 8:30 thinking: I HAVE TO GO!!
Christmas cookie exchange party at 1pm and I don't even have ingredients! And I was supposed to go running at 10:00 with a friend. Run = canceled. Without question. Cookies...?? So I ran to the grocery store picked up my items and got to work.
Note: I have never baked cookies before.
The stuff in the bowl was the consistency of ICE CREAM. I thought: "this can't be right..." (called Mom, she said it should look like that). Then,
I mixed in all the junk. Still had some misgivings, but this should do. After which,
They looked good in the pan! This is promising! But then,
ARGH!!! There were some that made it though, so I took them on to the exchange! Many came back home with me. Sadness. But it was a fun weekend.
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